It's early morning and Dales at the gym & the kids are still sleeping. I've been getting them up earlier this week at 7am to get them ready for school which starts Aug 3. It's hard to believe John will be starting Pre-K. When i first met him he was going to day care but then as soon as Dale & i got married and i quit my job, i started keeping him and Elizabeth home with me. Elizabeth was doing Pre-K for the second year because she has a late birthday, but she was so bored with it. And she's smart as a whip anyway! Really they all three are! It's amazing to me the questions they come up with! Lately John has been going thru a really rebellious stage and that's such a departure from his normally sweet and pleasing personality. It's nothing terrible or unexpected in a 4 yr old...but just heretofor unseen. Things like throwing down a toy very hard to the ground when angry and such. Stomping off and yelling back. We can handle it, but it's never been seen before in him.

Weight Watchers is still going pretty well...had a bad couple of weeks. On and off...gain, lose, gain lose seems to be the pattern. But at least the lose weeks are usually MUCH larger than the gains. So i'm at a total of 22.6 pounds down right now as i was UP this past Monday by .2 pounds. Good grief! that's LESS than a quarter of a pound. But still it was up. growls. One thing i stopped doing so much was journaling my food so i need to get back to that. And i need to increase the exercise. Since Dale has been doing his early morning raquetball appts with the guys at the gym, i havn't been going as often. And that's not an excuse...I've got a treadmill here i could use or i could go for a walk down the street. I just need to DO IT.

All for now! It's time to wake the kids.

Now it's about 627pm and i'm in here at the computer and Dale is mowing the lawn.

Steven (my brother) told me today that he and his wife Shannon are separated and plan to divorce. I wasnt surprised, but disappointed none the less.

On an upbeat note tho, I felt it today. a conviction down deep in my soul that we are going to do this weight loss burden that weighs so heavily on us. I was talking with Steven and telling him about my weight loss so far etc...and he is probably thinking to himself, yeah, i've heard it all before...but inside, i knew this time IS different. I want to do it for so many reasons...but the point is I, ME, wants this...not everyone else in my life wanting it FOR me, but me wanting it for me. And one of the reasons Don said he broke up with me was that when i wanted something, there was no telling me no....(he meant it in a bad way, ie..spend money on trips etc) well this time, it's a GOOD thing. I'm tired of hiding in the back on pictures or saying "make sure you only get my upper half. " I want to be the one smack dab in the front or stretched out on the floor even! LOL.